Costume Advice
LITTLE OLD LADIES & GENTS COSTUMES
Whether you're headed to a school event or just want to shuffle into the party with sass, this guide helps young folk go full-on retirement chic using what’s already around the house. From “Mall Walker Mildred” to “Retired Rock Star Ralph,” we’re talking high-waisted fashion, grumbly voices, and a whole lotta attitude.
SENIOR COSTUME LOOKS
DIY Costume Guide for Playing Grandpa & Grandma 👴👵
ESSENTIALS FOR ANY LITTLE OLD PERSON:
Closet Core:
-
Oversized cardigan or sweater – Borrow from a grown-up or hit the thrift store. Bonus if it smells slightly like mothballs.
-
Button-up shirt or floral blouse – The louder the pattern, the better.
-
Knee-length skirt or plaid pants – Elastic waistbands encouraged.
-
Suspenders – Can be made with ribbon, shoelaces, or even duct tape if you're feeling crafty.
-
Supportive shoes – Think loafers, oxfords, or Velcro sneakers. No Crocs allowed unless you’re an ironic retiree.
Gray Hair Magic:
-
Use baby powder or cornstarch on hair for that snowy white look.
-
Slick hair into a bun with bobby pins for granny glam.
-
For grandpas, craft a bald spot using a swimming cap and draw liver spots with brown eyeliner.
Eyewear Flair:
-
Big fake glasses = instant transformation. Pop the lenses out of 3D movie glasses or use toy glasses.
-
Chain your glasses with yarn or a shoelace for full librarian energy.
🧵 DIY ACCESSORY IDEAS:
Accessory How to Make It
Cane Wrap a broomstick in gray tape, or make one from cardboard and tinfoil.
Purse Use a lunchbox or tote bag and stuff it with tissues, mints, and fake coupons.
Pearl necklace String beads, buttons, or even cereal (Cheerios = vintage chic).
Hearing aid Shape aluminum foil into a little ear gadget and tape it on.
Back brace Layer a belt over a shirt or use an old Ace bandage.
🧓 HOW TO ACT LIKE YOU’RE 85 GOING ON 12:
Voice & Speech:
-
Talk like everything’s a little dramatic: “Back in my day…”
-
Overuse old phrases: “Whippersnapper!” “Land sakes!” “I haven’t seen that since the war.”
-
Add a little fake wheeze or dramatic sigh after everything.
Walk & Stance:
-
Hunch over just a little.
-
Shuffle your feet with purpose.
-
Walk slow… then faster when there's pudding.
Facial Expressions:
-
Look suspicious at new technology.
-
Squint at everything.
-
Smile politely while muttering something shady under your breath.
👵 ELDERLY ALTER EGO INSPIRATION:
-
Sassy Grandma Betty – Never leaves the house without lipstick and gossip.
-
Grumpy Grandpa Earl – Complains about “today’s music” and can’t figure out how to work the remote.
-
Garden Club Gloria – Obsessed with her petunias and your business.
-
Retired Biker Ron – Wears sunglasses indoors and tells wild stories that may or may not be true.
-
Florida Nana Nancy – Hawaiian shirt, sun visor, and a tennis racket “just in case.”
💡 BONUS PROPS TO BRING:
-
Crossword puzzle or large-print book
-
Pill organizer filled with jellybeans or raisins
-
Polaroid photo labeled “1964”
-
Tissue up your sleeve (a grandma essential)
-
Empty coffee mug that says “#1 Grandpa” or “World’s Okayest Grandma”
🧓 TL;DR (Too Long; Didn’t Rocking Chair):
-
Dig in your closet, borrow from relatives, and don’t be afraid to go full retro.
-
Baby powder, big glasses, and a cardigan = instant age jump.
-
It’s not just the look — it’s the shuffle, the sass, and the stories that sell it.