Possible Characters in the “Laughs, Loons & Loose Cannons” Category:

• Washed-up Stand-Up Comic

• Chicken Farmer or Egg Entrepreneur

• Reality TV Star or Wannabe Influencer

• Quirky Librarian or Oddball Archivist

• Conspiracy Theorist or UFO Truther

• Hypochondriac Heiress

• Overzealous PTA President

• Costume Designer (Theater, Movie, etc.)

• Failed Magician or Clumsy Illusionist

• Mascot Without a Team

• Rodeo Clown or Carnival Worker

• Oddball Neighbor or Eccentric Local Historian

• Off-the-Grid Survivalist or Doomsday Prepper

• Award-Winning Competitive Eater or Bingo Champion

​

🎤 Stand-Up Comic

Vibe: Still chasing laughs that never come. Has a “tight five,” but it’s mostly trauma.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Blazer with sneakers, ironic tee, messy hair, fake “Netflix special” badge.

• Women: Loud jacket or sequined blazer, jeans, chunky jewelry, fake confidence.
  Props: Toy microphone, cue cards labeled “Applause,” “Tough Crowd.”
  How to Act:

• Force punchlines where they don’t fit.

• Point finger guns after jokes.

• Pause dramatically after unfunny bits.

• Laugh at yourself before anyone else does.
  Quirks:

• Writes “new material” on napkins mid-party.

• Yells “Tip your servers!” at random moments.

• Refers to tragedies as “content.”
  Sayings:

“You’ve been a great crowd — except for you.”
“I killed at open mic… well, almost.”

​

🐔 Chicken Farmer or Egg Entrepreneur

Vibe: Rustic confidence meets bizarre enthusiasm for poultry.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Overalls or plaid shirt, boots, straw hat.

• Women: Gingham dress, denim jacket, bandana, rubber boots.
  Props: Rubber chicken, basket of fake eggs, feed scoop, name tag “Cluck Co. CEO.”
  How to Act:

• Talk about chickens like they’re people.

• Compare everything to farming (“Murder’s just like molting, ain’t it?”).

• Offer eggs as bribes.
  Quirks:

• Clucks instead of laughing.

• Yells “SHE’S GONNA LAY!” out of nowhere.
  Sayings:

“These hens tell me everything.”
“I run the most egg-cellent operation in town.”

​

🎥 Reality TV Star or Wannabe Influencer

Vibe: Drama magnet with main-character energy.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Designer knockoff shirt, flashy chain, sunglasses indoors.

• Women: Crop top, faux fur jacket, sparkly leggings, phone glued to hand.
  Props: Selfie stick, glittery water bottle, fake “crew badge.”
  How to Act:

• Narrate everything: “This is my redemption arc.”

• Cry on cue for dramatic effect.

• Rehearse confessionals in the corner.
  Quirks:

• Says “No spoilers!” about real life.

• Gives themselves hashtags (#JusticeForMe).
  Sayings:

“I didn’t come here to make friends — but I did bring my ring light.”
“Is this being filmed? Good.”

​

📚 Quirky Librarian or Oddball Archivist

Vibe: Knows everything — and says it out loud.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Cardigan, bow tie, slacks, glasses on a string.

• Women: Pencil skirt, blouse, messy bun, reading glasses, cardigan.
  Props: Stack of books, magnifying glass, fake overdue slips.
  How to Act:

• “Shh!” people dramatically.

• Quote random facts mid-chaos.

• Reorganize objects alphabetically.
  Quirks:

• Corrects everyone’s grammar.

• Smells pages of old books.
  Sayings:

“Murder? You’ll find that under ‘M’ — right between mystery and mayhem.”
“Shhh. The walls have ears. And excellent acoustics.”

​

🛸 Conspiracy Theorist or UFO Truther

Vibe: Connects everything to something no one else believes.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Cargo pants, hoodie, baseball cap, “Trust No One” tee.

• Women: Camouflage jacket, messy ponytail, tinfoil bracelet.
  Props: Flashlight, map with red string, tinfoil hat.
  How to Act:

• Whisper constantly.

• Look around suspiciously before answering.

• Draw diagrams no one asked for.
  Quirks:

• Blames everything on “the government.”

• Claims to have seen lights in the sky.
  Sayings:

“That’s what they want you to think.”
“Coincidence? Not in this galaxy.”

​

👑 Hypochondriac Heiress

Vibe: Glamorous, dramatic, and convinced she’s seconds from fainting.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men (Heir): Pastel blazer, silk scarf, hand sanitizer bottle.

• Women (Heiress): Satin robe, pearls, slippers, beauty mask.
  Props: Thermometer, tissues, pill organizer (filled with candy).
  How to Act:

• Moan softly whenever someone sneezes.

• Mention obscure illnesses by name.

• Refuse to touch anything.
  Quirks:

• Waves a perfume bottle like disinfectant.

• Keeps fainting onto people for attention.
  Sayings:

“I can’t be near stress — my doctor forbids it.”
“I’m allergic to… drama.”

​

🍎 Overzealous PTA President

Vibe: Control freak with a clipboard and too much “school spirit.”
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Polo shirt, khakis, lanyard, name tag “Committee Chair.”

• Women: Cardigan, pearls, headband, tote bag.
  Props: Clipboard, bake sale flyer, red pen, fake donation jar.
  How to Act:

• Call meetings that no one attends.

• Interrupt to “keep things organized.”

• Say “We don’t point fingers… but I’m pointing mine.”
  Quirks:

• Claps after every sentence.

• Cites bylaws nobody’s read.
  Sayings:

“We don’t tolerate nonsense — except on bake sale days.”
“If this isn’t in the minutes, it didn’t happen.”

​

🎬 Costume Designer (Theater, Movie, etc.)

Vibe: Creative genius with glitter in their hair and no filter.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Black shirt, scarf, tape measure around neck.

• Women: Bohemian blouse, statement jewelry, paint-stained jeans.

• Both: Wear one of your stage costumes for BIG laughs! It can be anything! 

• Props: Fabric swatches, measuring tape, clipboard of sketches.
  How to Act:

• Compliment everyone’s “choices.” (Tone = unclear.)

• Snap fingers dramatically.

• Redesign people’s outfits mid-party.
  Quirks:

• Yells “Wardrobe emergency!” over nothing.

• Carries sewing pins everywhere.
  Sayings:

“Fashion is pain — and I bring both.”
“You call it blood; I call it dramatic red.”

​

🎩 Failed Magician or Clumsy Illusionist

Vibe: Tried magic once. It went wrong. Still hasn’t recovered.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Cape, vest, torn gloves, slightly melted top hat.

• Women: Glitter jacket, tutu, crooked wand, hair that’s been “shocked.”
  Props: Broken wand, deck of mismatched cards, hat with no rabbit.
  How to Act:

• Attempt magic tricks. Fail every time.

• Blame the audience.

• Make dramatic exits that go nowhere.
  Quirks:

• Sneezes glitter.

• Shouts “Ta-da!” before tripping.
  Sayings:

“It worked in rehearsal!”
“I’m not clumsy — I’m cursed.”

​

🐮 Mascot Without a Team

Vibe: Energetic but unemployed. Still wears the costume.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men/Women: Sports jersey, face paint, or full mascot head (optional).
  Props: Foam finger, pom-pom, half-torn team banner.
  How to Act:

• Cheer for no reason.

• High-five strangers.

• Occasionally growl, moo, or squeak.
  Quirks:

• Cries quietly when people ask “Which team?”

• Offers motivational speeches to nobody.
  Sayings:

“Once a mascot, always a spirit animal.”
“We may have lost the game… and funding.”

​

🤡 Rodeo Clown or Carnival Worker

Vibe: Equal parts fun and fear. Smells like popcorn and chaos.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Colorful overalls, face paint, cowboy hat.

• Women: Polka-dot dress, striped socks, suspenders.
  Props: Fake balloons, whistle, toy lasso.
  How to Act:

• Laugh too loudly.

• Call everyone “partner” or “kiddo.”

• Do pratfalls often.
  Quirks:

• Has a mysterious fear of ferris wheels.

• Constantly honks a clown horn.
  Sayings:

“The real show’s behind the tent.”
“They said laughter’s the best medicine… now look at me.”

​

🏚️ Oddball Neighbor or Eccentric Local Historian

Vibe: Knows everything about everyone — and it’s unsettling.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Sweater vest, corduroy pants, binoculars.

• Women: Vintage dress, shawl, pearls, notebook.
  Props: Clipboard, magnifying glass, “local archives” folder.
  How to Act:

• Whisper rumors as “historical facts.”

• Show up from behind curtains.

• Offer “rare” info for no reason.
  Quirks:

• Collects random items as “evidence.”

• Knows everyone’s birthday.
  Sayings:

“Back in 1892, something just like this happened…”
“I’m not nosy — I’m preserving history.”

​

🪓 Off-the-Grid Survivalist or Doomsday Prepper

Vibe: Paranoid but prepared. Probably built a bunker.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Flannel shirt, cargo pants, boots, bandana.

• Women: Utility jacket, hiking boots, beanie, fingerless gloves.
  Props: Canteen, flashlight, fake emergency rations.
  How to Act:

• Whisper about “when society collapses.”

• Offer jerky from mysterious sources.

• Judge everyone’s survival skills.
  Quirks:

• Checks exits constantly.

• Hides canned goods under chairs.
  Sayings:

“You’ll thank me when the power grid fails.”
“I’ve got 47 gallons of water and one bad feeling.”

​

🏆 Award-Winning Competitive Eater or Bingo Champion

Vibe: Overly proud of small victories.
Costume (from your closet):

• Men: Track jacket, medal, visor.

• Women: Glitter top, fanny pack, victory sash.
  Props: Fake trophy, bingo card, snack bag.
  How to Act:

• Bring up your “title” constantly.

• Call everything a “competition.”

• Warm up before sitting down.
  Quirks:

• Counts bites out loud.

• Yells “BINGO!” inappropriately.
  Sayings:

“It’s not luck — it’s strategy.”
“They said I couldn’t… but I did. Twice.”

​

🧢 Tips & Tricks for Playing Funny Characters

• Overcommit — every movement should feel like a sitcom moment.

• Treat your prop like your best friend.

• Interrupt serious scenes with random “fun facts” or bad advice.

• When in doubt, declare your own flashback: “This reminds me of the Great Pancake Scandal of ’09…”

• Laugh at your own jokes. Loudly. For too long.

​